Conversations with Jessica, illustrated
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On negotiation
We’re getting ready in the morning, and Jessica pops into the kitchen where I’m gathering my keys. Me: Here, let me help you with you hair. Jessica: What’s wrong with it? Me: It needs to be a little neater. Jessica: Like how neat does it need to be? Me: It needs to be 100% neat….
Conversations with Jessica
I introduced Jess to the wonders of Mary Poppins (the movie) the other day. And here is how our conversation went: Jess: This is such a good movie! Did you watch it on DVD when you were a kid? Me: We didn’t have DVDs when I was a kid. Jess: But you know all…
On things you’d think I would know by now
Jessica is opening her Christmas presents. Some of them are things she picked out for herself that I’ve wrapped and put under the tree. She pulls the paper back from a book and asks, perplexed, “Am I supposed to be surprised by this?” She can’t remember what she has picked out and what she hasn’t….
Bad words, revisited
So Jessica comes home to tell me about a new student who is learning boundaries. Me: Tell your teacher if he’s too much of an ass. Jessica: I will, except I won’t call him an a-s-s. Me: Probably wise. Jessica: Did you use bad language at school? Me: Not in front of anyone who would…
How a Book Is Born, Part 16
I’m working on the book while my daughter is sitting next to me on the sofa. Jess: Are you distracted again? Me: I’m trying to figure out what comes next in this book. Jess: What’s happening now? Me: Natalie’s in the hospital. Jess (gasping): Why is Natalie in the hospital?! Me: She has pneumonia. You…
On most-wanted lists
Jess and I are going to see Muppets: Most Wanted, and she wants to know what “most wanted” means. Me: If the police know you’ve done something criminal, but they don’t know where to find you, they might put you on the most-wanted list. Then if you’re spotted, the police will arrest you. Jessica: Well,…