Conversations with Jessica, illustrated
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On the appointed one
Jessica and I are snowed in, watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix, sitting on the lime-green sofa and laying bets on whether there really will be six more weeks of winter, when she says, “Remind me who the acquainted one is.” “The who?” I ask. She points to the laptop and Buffy, and I…
On the way we are made
“I hope the house is not on fire,” Jessica remarks, coming into the bedroom where I am folding laundry. “What?!?!!” I shriek. “There,” she says, pointing. “That looks like a flame.” It does, but it is simply a scrap of red metallic paper that has fetched up against the wall, probably leftover from a piece…
On how a book is made. Or not.
A lot of people have asked for a book that includes all of my conversations with Jessica. I post these conversations on Facebook, where my friends hang out, so I sort of think, “Yeah, I collect the conversations into a book and then the three friends of mine who are solvent will buy it. The…
Spelling Test
Jessica: Is it L-A-B-O-R? For “labor”? Me: Yes. Unless you’re British, and then— Jessica: I’m not. Thank you. Me: Okay. Jessica: Sometimes it is better to stop you before you get started. ### My collection of travel stories, Travels with Jessica, is now available! Kindle and paperback here; other ebook formats here. And I’ve published…
On how the weather is
“It’s going to rain today,” Jessica says. “Yes, it sure looks like it,” I agree. “I just wanted to make sure you know.” “Um, okay,” I say. I am fully capable of reading a weather forecast or looking up at the iron-gray sky and reaching the appropriate conclusion, but whatever. An hour later, I’m in…
Bad words, revisited
So Jessica comes home to tell me about a new student who is learning boundaries. Me: Tell your teacher if he’s too much of an ass. Jessica: I will, except I won’t call him an a-s-s. Me: Probably wise. Jessica: Did you use bad language at school? Me: Not in front of anyone who would…