I introduced Jess to the wonders of Mary Poppins (the movie) the other day. And here is how our conversation went:
Jess: This is such a good movie! Did you watch it on DVD when you were a kid?
Me: We didn’t have DVDs when I was a kid.
Jess: But you know all the songs!
Me: Well, I had the record.
Jess: What’s a record?
And this is how I know I am old.
Jessica: What are you doing? Me: Getting a ream of paper out of the closet. Jessica: What is a ream of paper? Me: A package of 500 sheets of paper. Although at one time a ream was 480 pages. You see— Jessica (trying to distract me): What’s for dinner? Me: And you know what else?…
We’re getting ready in the morning, and Jessica pops into the kitchen where I’m gathering my keys. Me: Here, let me help you with you hair. Jessica: What’s wrong with it? Me: It needs to be a little neater. Jessica: Like how neat does it need to be? Me: It needs to be 100% neat….
I am sitting in Jessica’s IEP meeting thinking there is not enough strong drink available. There is none at all, in fact, though my position has always been that serving alcohol would make these sessions easier to get through. I don’t mean to imply that there is anything difficult about the other people seated around…
Jessica is opening her Christmas presents. Some of them are things she picked out for herself that I’ve wrapped and put under the tree. She pulls the paper back from a book and asks, perplexed, “Am I supposed to be surprised by this?” She can’t remember what she has picked out and what she hasn’t….
Jessica (looking over my shoulder at a blog post): That is not exactly what we said. Me: You know, someday I’m going to win a Pulitzer and you’ll be telling the committee, “It didn’t happen exactly like that.” Jessica: Yes. For example your hair is not that curly. Me: I exaggerate it for effect. You…
I’m working on the book while my daughter is sitting next to me on the sofa. Jess: Are you distracted again? Me: I’m trying to figure out what comes next in this book. Jess: What’s happening now? Me: Natalie’s in the hospital. Jess (gasping): Why is Natalie in the hospital?! Me: She has pneumonia. You…
