On things I never used to know
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On what life teaches us
A friend of mine has been diagnosed with one of those diseases that could kill him in a month or it might hold off for a while. Understandably he has been thrown by this, the uncertainty as much as the diagnosis. How do you live when you know the end is coming, but you don’t…
On not being quiet
On Wednesday Jessica had an early release day from school and so we went into the studio and made some glass. Jessica is a glass artist, an eighteen-year-old senior in high school, my daughter and my ward. She is cognitively impaired and through a painful and too-lengthy guardianship process, her father and I proved to…
Another story about Jessica
“You’re being a pain in the ask,” Jessica tells me, and for a horrified moment, I think I’m going to burst into laughter. That’s not exactly how the phrase goes, of course, and there’s something extremely amusing about my daughter’s serious face as she says it. She’s resisting bedtime, a thing she doesn’t do very…
One of my favorite things
A few years ago, as I was tucking Jessica into bed, she kissed me on both cheeks and said, “I love you and think you are beautiful.” I have no idea why she thought I needed to hear those two sentiments at once, but I am glad she did, because it has become my favorite…
A vigil for Jessica
Jessica is scheduled for a procedure in the morning. Routine, in its way, but nothing is ever routine with her anymore. If it ever was. You used to think it would get easier. But it doesn’t. You get understanding, yes, and you know what to do and where to stand, and you long ago made…
On Douglas the Dragon
We are at a shop, ducking in out of the rain, when Jessica spots a beautiful stuffed dragon that looks exactly like Douglas, except it is red and has gold wings. Douglas is turquoise with silver wings, and Jessica puts him beside me everyone morning so he can help me do my work. “There is…
